How To Overcome Subconscious Self Sabotage
The sneaky thing about the ways we sabotage ourselves is that it is often unseen. Self-sabotage is often subconscious. It shows up in ways we justify to ourselves as external situations or the perfect excuse.
Picture this, you read all of the self-help books, you have a millionaire mindset, you have all of the money you need and even more than you know what to do with, everyone loves you, you are healthy, and yet you find a reason to catastrophize one thing. It could be an interaction with a stranger, or more likely a loved one. How could this be? When will things ever change?
Life is full of uncertainty. Uncertainty and fear can show up in times of growth, or even in moments that we do not know how to navigate. You may have everything going for you and find yourself showing up as your younger self. This is more common than people think AND there is a way to change it.
How to overcome subconscious self sabotage:
1. Get conscious- Sounds simple, right? Getting conscious requires us to slow down, change gears, and start using the prefrontal cortex. It requires smooth deep breathing and the transfer of system 1 thinking (impulsive and fast) to system 2 thinking (slow and intentional). You can use different strategies such as Mel Robbin's "5-second rule" or Jay Shetty's breathing techniques. Regardless of what you choose, make sure you slow down and get conscious
2. Learn to love yourself unconditionally -(you will need tools to keep coming back to). This is the most important thing you may every learn. Love yourself the way you would a small child. Eat well, sleep well, exercise, and speak to yourself with compassion. If you need guidance, speak to a counsellor or visit Kristin Neff's work.
3. Create a blueprint for uncertainty- Imagine yourself showing up as your best self. It might help to read this in your head, or better yet, write it down "In uncertain times (insert event or situation here), I want to show up as the evolved and conscious person I am. I love myself and deserve the best.
Now, don't think you are being let off the hook easily. Once learned, this comes in to your consciousness, but we will continue to slip in to our subconscious ways of being. This happens most when we are stressed, tired, or fearful.
The key is to remember. Constantly remind yourself to come back to the tools and you will open yourself to the life that only you are preventing yourself from living!
May you be well!